To work or not to work, that is the question.
I have submitted six resumes over the course of the past four weeks and even though I have yet to receive any feedback, I'm debating my course of action if I do. I constantly go back and forth in my head on this issue and I feel like they have equal pros and cons. Although I am super stressed out more than I probably should be, I do love spending my days with my boys and watching them grow up. The days when they are well behaved I feel so blessed to be able to spend every minute with them but the days they are out of control I instantly go into "my dark hole", as I like to call it. But I suppose life as a whole has ups and downs and you just have to learn how to handle each of them. I've convinced myself that I was just simply not put on this planet to be a SAHM but some of my friends often kind comments make me think otherwise. I've been referred to as "mom of the year" and often called an 'inspiration' because of my creativity with my children. I guess if I were offered a job I could try it out and see if I'm happier or more stressed and worst case scenario just quit and be back at square one, but the effort it would take to find reliable and trusting childcare for both of the boys seems overwhelming and there is no garantees it will be worth it.
::sigh:: I just don't know..
*SAHM = Stay at home mom.
1 comments:
Everyone is different and you have to find what works best for you. I like the idea of testing it out and seeing how it works. I have thought about it myself and for me, no one is going to love my kids like Shane and I. I am too paranoid about something bad happening with someone else watching my kids. Granted, if you do find reliable and trustworthy childcare it could be good for you to get away a little bit and good for the kids to learn to be without you sometimes as well. Also, a job is a job and it will have it's good and down days too I'm sure, but none of the good days at the job will come even close to the good days with your boys! I say give it a chance if you get a response and can find good childcare. Like you said, you could always quit. I plan on going back to school or working when my kids are in school. You could always do that too! Good luck!
P.s. you are very inspirational! You always look like your having so much fun...You encourage me to get off my bum and do more with my girls! :)
-Angela C
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